School Refusal

As I have said before, I often get asked for advice on school related issues. Being the little nerd I am, I go away and do some research and think about things. Then I try to put all the information and my thoughts together to form a coherent blog post that may be of help to other parents. School refusal is something that came up this week for me as I heard about yet another child I know “dropping out” of our local second level school. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not some kind of school attendance fanatic with my kitchen walls covered in attendance awards for my kids. I don’t send them into school with the consumption or pleurisy in order to tick that roll book every day and get a medal for my lack of consideration for the health of others at the end of the year. In my house, if you decide you’re going to be part of the education system then you follow through and I will support you in whatever way I can with that choice. I also know that being in school (or being home educated by a loving family) is a protective factor from future unemployment, poverty, addictions etc. Unfortunately, the children I see falling out of the system are often from a particular socio-economic and educational attainment background. The cycle of disadvantage continues to repeat itself and the child is the loser.

Image from Shutterstock.com

I have a little experience of school refusal with my own children at different stages. Playschool refuser, coping with a medical condition and a new sibling. Playschool refuser coping with family separation and house move. Primary school refuser with “Mondayitis” coping with toxic hidden curriculum of a classroom. Primary school refuser who would just rather be outside all day. There’s always a reason that a child is refusing school. It’s just not immediately obvious to us adults. It is sometimes only with hindsight or careful investigation that we find out the logic behind the behaviour.

National, confidential helpline that offers parents support. Their  helplines are open from Monday to Thursday 10am to 9pm and Fridays 10am to 4pm.

Parentline 1890 927277

What?

School refusal is when a child of schoolgoing age (6-16 years) refuses to go to school. They continue to refuse in spite of the bribes, pleading and threats of their parents. There can be occasional “days off” where a child “pulls a sickie”. I like to call these Extra Personal Vacation days, and there’s usually a reason behind them too e.g. avoiding a history test, being too tired after a family occasion or outdoor work. These I don’t worry about. School refusers are children who are refusing to go to school most days of the week and end up missing a lot of the school year. These children (and their parents) are the ones I would be concerned for.

Why?

Why are children refusing to go to school? There are probably thousands of reasons. The Parentline website outlines a few. Anxiety, bullying and issues with a teacher or principal can be reasons. I would also add unmet additional education needs as a reason. If a child is lost academically there is no way they will continue to engage with a school that ignores their difficuties for six years. And why should they? Would you show up for work every day if you had only a vague idea of what was involved in your job and were missing essential tools you needed for doing your work? Another more current reason is Covid 19 related issues. A pandemic happened and our government decided closing schools would be helpful. Children had to switch to learning online, which was a massive failure for many. Think about families who do not have access to devices or proper internet. Think about children who only go to school so they can see friends and have some banter with teachers who are open to it. Academically minded children may have been fine online and many of these may have had the family background that afforded them the necessary technology and personal supports. Even these children though learned a lof about fear, mistrust and the unfairness of our educaiton system as it stands – particularly exam year students. Then we all went back to school, and BOOM! the rug was pulled out from under us again. Second closure did even more damage in my opinion. Primary level children who were academically achieving, socially well adjusted and would never have thought of refusing school are having difficulties. For some children, being in close proximity to other children is a source of fear now. Others have a new and paralysing fear of “germs” and have developed obsessive compulsive behaviours in relation to hygiene and handwashing. Agoraphobia, fear of leaving their home is an issue for others. Considering what they have been through in the past two years, I think all children should be commended for their efforts in continuing with education in whatever form it is being offered to them. Further supports need to be offered to those who are struggling to engage. “Extraordinary times call for extraordinary measures”.

https://schoolavoidance.org/

On the above website you will find a tool called “The school Refusal Assessment scale-revised” by Dr. Chris Keaney and Dr. Wendy K Silverman. It is a psychological assessment tool to assess what is causing a child school refusal. You can download the assessment and tick the boxes in the checklist to see what the primary cause of your child’s school avoidance might be. There’s often more than one thing going on for a child who is refusing school.

Common Causes Associated with School Avoidance (from schoolavoidance.org)

Anxiety Disorders

  • Panic disorder
  • Social anxiety
  • Separation anxiety
  • PTSD
  • OCD
  • Specific phobia
  • Generalized Anxiety Disorder
  • Selective mutism
  • Emetophobia-fear of vomiting
  • Defiant Disorder

Learning Differences

  • Processing Speed Disorders
  • Dyscalculia-” Math Dyslexia,” Not Math Anxiety
  • Disorder of Written Expression Dysgraphia
  • Executive Functioning Deficits
  • Working Memory Deficits

Other Causes

  • Developmental Trauma
  • Perfectionism
  • ADD/ADHD
  • Bullying
  • Prolonged absence due to Injury or Illness
  • Death or Illness of parent or pet
  • Changes in class or school
  • New teacher
  • Toxic teacher
  • Feeling unsafe at school

If your child has any of the above and is refusing school they definitely warrant a referral for further support. A parent is their child’s advocate, remember you know your child best and do not be afraid to ask for help.

Interventions

https://www.cypsc.ie/

Children and Young People’s Services Committees (CYPSC) are a key structure identified by Government to plan and co-ordinate services for children and young people in every county in Ireland.  The overall purpose is to improve outcomes for children and young people through local and national interagency working. 

CYPSC are county-level committees that bring together the main statutory, community and voluntary providers of services to children and young people.  They provide a forum for joint planning and co-ordination of activity to ensure that children, young people and their families receive improved and accessible services.

Through the Documents section of this website I came across an excellent resource called The Wicklow School Refusal Pack. This pack is the result of a collaborative effort by multiple agencies. Here school refusal is defined, information for parents and guardians is clerly presented along with interventions for schools. It also contains a very interesting chapter on School refusal and ASD. Here’s the link.

Useful contacts

  • Your school’s Home School Community Liaison teacher (if there is one)
  • Local school completion programme
  • Education welfare officer
  • NEPS
  • Jigsaw
  • Family support services
  • CAMHS
  • PCCC psychology
  • ISPCC
  • Youth services

School refusal is a common problem with complex causes and solutions. If your child’s attendance at school is becoming a cause of stress for you or them, do reach out. There is help available. Trust your gut. Mind your child and yourself.

Published by siobhanhyland

I am a 43 year old woman. I work part-time as a primary school teacher, helping children with additional needs. I have four children ranging in age from 12 to 19 years. I teach Kundalini yoga to adults and Radiant child yoga also. I am a farmer's wife and love helping out on the farm. My absolute passion is education and facilitating learning in any way I can.

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